Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
