So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
