This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
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