so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
