So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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