I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
