Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize