she kept yelling 'call me bella'
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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