At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
