we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
