oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Well I just put wine in my tea
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
