Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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