Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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