Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
