nut hugger
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
