So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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