she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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