Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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