we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just pynch a tree in the face
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I understand Curling. That high.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
We have so much sex to catch up on
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
