Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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