I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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