so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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