Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
