Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I need moral support for this bender
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
