WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
