I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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