I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
