I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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