Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize