In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
we're so committed to being not committed
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
