Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
my being single is dangerous.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
