Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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