i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize