on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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