So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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