I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
