Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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