I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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