Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
