Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Randomize
