listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
