No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Randomize
