is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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