Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
