we have officially mastered the walk of shame
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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