Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
