i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
