not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
