perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
