I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
