I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I just blew my weed a kiss
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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